Lent 2010: Day 15 – Then Comes the Testing

From “teachable moments” to the requisite testing, I have moved on from my initial experience examined yesterday to the logical and expected follow-on: the test. Isn’t that normal? You get taught, then you get tested. Why would God be different? He could be, but he’s not. It is after all, his choice.

…so we speak, not to please man, but to please God who tests our hearts. 1 Thessalonians 2:4b

God teaches us; God tests us; we succeed and move on or we fail, repent, and relearn the lesson. Sounds pretty straight forward, doesn’t it. It isn’t, because more often than not, as I pointed out in God’s Teachable Moments (scroll back one posting), we aren’t listening and the lesson is then wasted on our deafness. So, there is nothing to test. We missed it.

Today it began. Had I begun listening? I hope so. This afternoon there were some tests. I think I met the situations better because of my new openness, my greater willingness to listen, to hear what God is saying in the situation. It was a teachable moment, followed pretty quickly by a test; how would I react; how far would I push; what would I hold onto and what would I let go of and why?

It was different, this new sensitivity, this willingness to hear, to listen, to work out what to do in conjunction with my Heavenly Father in a way that beyond my previous experience. There was/is an immediacy to it all that is hard to explain. At the same time, this is dangerous and scary stuff and it reminds me of Hebrews 10:31, “It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.”

It will be an interesting journey, this commitment, this willingness to be open to the immediacy of God. The afterglow of the original experience is finally diminishing. Soon there will be just the doing of it. That is not to say I won’t be given other, similar moments, but they are not the goal and when they come, they will come unbidden, part of the grace of it all. It is the choices that are central, the will for the doing of the right thing, the right way, for the right reason. The other is a bonus, which can never become a temptation unto itself.

I guess that is part of the test too, seeing how well I can keep my balance and my focus. Good. Hold only God tightly, be willing to let go of everything else, and move along. After all, we are travelers on the road to what we will become and getting there is a journey not a destination, at least in this life.

Grace, peace, and blessings to your day and say hi when you see me on the road.

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